Beside the Trenches

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Beside the Trenches

October 11, 2011 by Chris G.

Gallant cried the horseman

saddled with his cloth and care,

rattling his salivating saber

to a bugle’s tune of God and Country.

There were no spurs so swift

beyond the field where trenches lay.

The drums and alarums still rattled banners

as man and beast gave rise to dusted glory,

untouchable, their raucous shadow lines where

gallant cried the horseman.

Barbed wire bound it,

lurching, whistling, wrangled thing,

torn beside the steaming trench.

A horse,

dead beside the steaming trench.

Today, I’m trying something a little different here at the Waking Den. Poetry remains the name of the game, but this is a piece inspired, and built upon the basis of another, far older work, you may recall–Stephen Crane’s infamous “Fast rode the knight”. A testament to the transition of ages, and to the horrors of war, his work was an elegy to the medieval. However, war is a timeless thing, and our folly never resigned to one age or another – and in his words, I personally always saw the potential for application to WWI.

Trenches were the walls then. Our gallant knights instead well-dressed officers still possessed of honours and ideals the machine gun, and gas, and all the other horrors of that time would horrifically subdue. And so I worked a touch of modernization…hopefully without offending anyone; but then, that’s why this explanation was here. I hope you enjoyed, and I encourage you to read Crane’s original as well.

Posted in Poems | Tagged Death, Galford, Horror, Images, Poetry, Stephen Crane, War | 20 Comments

20 Responses

on October 11, 2011 at 2:15 pm | Reply velvetinapurrs

Thank you for the notes Chris, & I will read Crane..in terms of your poem, I think it works really well, the first longer stanza, you feel almost lulled by the older imagery, the tools, accessories for war from a different far age, and then the second stanza, hits, & everything links up in your mind, ending with the stark image of the horse..
on October 11, 2011 at 4:43 pm | Reply brian miller

the barbed wire brought back images from that scene in legends of the fall…ugh…yeah could you imagine war back then…the hungry blad…nice imagery chris….
on October 11, 2011 at 5:08 pm | Reply Pat Hatt

War is never great, but it must have been really tortured back then in so many different ways that now, really evoked that age with your piece.
on October 11, 2011 at 5:38 pm | Reply ayala

Nice imagery, Chris. Thank you for your notes on this!
on October 11, 2011 at 7:19 pm | Reply hedgewitch

I knew the cadence was reminding me of something–i just re-read that Crane poem the other day when I was picking through his work for my Off the Shelf page–he was a terrific poet. I like what you’ve done here, Chris–i was all set up for something medieval with the horseman image, and you zapped it fast forward to those monstrous faces behind gas masks and foul trenches of WWI…eloquent, and pitiful, the story of war, esp the final stanza.
on October 11, 2011 at 8:31 pm | Reply Anna Montgomery

I spent hours of my childhood crying over images of war involving dead horses (they were innocents and so like children strewn across the field). As you so kindly said at my site there are poems that make you think and poems that make you cry. This is a fine example of both.
on October 11, 2011 at 8:31 pm | Reply DW

your words brought this to life, brilliant piece
on October 12, 2011 at 5:47 am | Reply Heaven

Bravery, honor and courage.. these ideals are what these soldiers and tehir horses evoke.

Like the barbed wire line…. thanks for the additional notes.

Also, your kind words in my blog… I needed it~
on October 12, 2011 at 6:15 am | Reply Glynn

As I started reading, I thought of Rupert Brooke. The I realized why. Good poem, Chris.
on October 12, 2011 at 10:44 am | Reply hobgoblin2011

Chris, great job here. i wrote a piece that deals with war as well. Really liked the way yours turned out. Excellent write, thanks for the read
on October 12, 2011 at 1:41 pm | Reply ChasingTao

I definately like this! You, Chris, are a natural! So many people get caught up in technicality or rhyme or whatever, and are just ‘wannabe’ poets, but you, good fellow, are the real deal, and an inspiration! Roger ☺
on October 12, 2011 at 2:12 pm | Reply Sheila Moore

I think what you did works very well. I’m impressed.
on October 12, 2011 at 2:29 pm | Reply Sarah Johnston

Amazing and I do have to say you did a great job on this one I think it worked so well and I am so impressed with this poem and your words
http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/11/the-day-of-the-dead/#comment-1682
on October 12, 2011 at 8:00 pm | Reply Charles Elliott/Beautyseer

Alas, trenches, barbed wire, poison gas and withering machine gun fire made World War I the last in which horse-mounted cavalry was significantly deployed. Over 8 million horses died on all sides! The scene was set for the infernal combustion engine to take over everywhere. The world would never be the same.
on October 12, 2011 at 9:14 pm | Reply Jenne' Andrews

I greatly admire your bold experiment, Chris. You have so much innate ability– by jove, I think you’re a poet. I’m actually at http://parolavivace.blogspot.com . xxxj
on October 13, 2011 at 1:29 am | Reply The Orange Tree

excellent.
on October 13, 2011 at 9:22 am | Reply manicddaily

Thanks, Chris. It reminds me of WarHorse;the imagery of a destroyed horse so moving.
on October 13, 2011 at 3:03 pm | Reply Joanne Elliott (@soulsprite)

War leaves nothing untouched it seems. You’ve captured what must have seemed so glorious until the reality of it all hit. Thank you for sharing your talent with us.
on October 13, 2011 at 3:33 pm | Reply Luke Prater

Excellent Pastiche, though I hesitate to call it that, it somehow feels a little like a back-handed compliment (not intended). Your erudition here, and generally, is obviously immense
on October 15, 2011 at 6:25 am | Reply C Rose

You executed this very well Chris, it absolutely carrying a timeless message. Your imagery and the repetition of “steaming trench” in the end lines made this vivid in its expression. Enjoyed this my friend, hope you are well! ~ Rose